Speaks To Me Sunday #67

2 Oct


I’ve been having some bad days lately… Upsetting moments happen, and I can’t seem to shake it.

Honestly? Sometimes I don’t want to. (Oh, how hard that is to say.) I am choosing to sit in it… Simmering and seething in my anger, sadness, worry, shame… Whatever emotion brought about by a single instance. I want to wallow in it. Total pity party.

Why? 

My ego. My ego feels so good when I am right… And I don’t mean my ego like a place of self confidence or worth. I’m talking about that small, but clear voice in my head that says “you are right.” My ego wants me to be right no matter the cost – even if that means my actions end up hurting me… Or even sometimes others. 

I am right to be angry because this person did me wrong, I am right to be sad because that didn’t work out how I wanted, I am right to be ashamed because no one else would have made that mistake. 

It’s so easy to listen to my ego. But my ego is also a liar capable of robbing me of happiness for an entire day. Who wants to live like that? Who would choose that. The price of “being right” is far too high. Truth? My life is not made better by listening to my ego and sinking into negativity. My life is made better when I tell that voice to shut up, when I shrug off that bad moment, when I offer my burdens to God, when I talk out my feelings with someone who cares for me, when I choose to be happy instead.

Bad moments may happen. But that doesn’t mean it has to be a bad day. From here on out, I am going to work on choosing happy. 

Who’s with me?!

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